Thursday, March 6, 2014

Help! I'm addicted to Facecrack

See, even Dr Oz agrees! 
Are you constantly on Facebook? Are you constantly keeping up with more than just the Kardashians? Do you creep old friends, college hook-ups or family members to see what they are up to?

And after all this, do you feel more happy and fulfilled with your own life?

I used to think I did... 

Of course I've read articles in the media and various health blogs claiming that social media makes you unhappy. And I always dismissed these ideas thinking how can something that brings my family and friends  closer  make me unhappy. It's one of the most difficult things about living abroad - being so far away from your family and friends. My life changed so much when I joined Facebook back in 2007. 

I felt like I wasn't missing out on what was going on back home and felt reconnected to my culture again.

But after being isolated last week in the German hills with no internet for one week, my eyes opened to how Facebook aka Facecrack was really making me feel. I was able to "rest" and I wasn't busy in my mind thinking about how I was going to update my status. For one week, my thoughts flowed and after a few days I stopped thinking in status updates and Tweets.

It was hard the first few days, especially because it wasn't by choice. It was like wanting a chocolate candy bar so badly but there was none to be found anywhere. I guess I could easily compare it to my sugar addiction. I wanted to be connected so badly, I was desperate. I was in Social Media Rehab.

By the third day, the desperation subsided and I had a peace in my head that I really can't explain. I think for one thing, it gave me a chance to stop subconsciously comparing myself to others. Of course, I know its silly to do such a thing, but I think as a human it is something that comes naturally. Plus with social media, you are not only keeping up with the Jones' next door, you are keeping up with 500 - 100 of your closest friends around the world.

Another thing I think that makes me unhappy, is all the scrolling and the fast information. I am getting old and I am sleep deprived, my poor shriveled brain can only take so much. Not to mention, I think I am addicted to the attention I get when I post something. I am constantly looking to see who commented or who liked or thinking why someone didn't comment or didn't like. I take Facebook personally and that makes me really unhappy.

But the biggie for me is when I am on Facebook, the good little angel on my shoulder is whispering "What are you doing? You are wasting your time to finding out what your Travolta name is or what Game of Thrones character you are? You should be doing something productive!"

And that makes me feel even worse, like I'm continuously wasting my  time. I'm a full-time working mother of two, my time is precious. My passion is writing and I could use those 30 minutes writing. But no, instead I am on Facebook scrolling through the world of others while not nurturing my own world. My creativity is drying up with each status update.

This is what I realized after one week of being disconnected. Plus, I felt great and my mind was quiet and I enjoyed every second of my day. I actually read a book people! First time in years! However, I was disillusioned that this disconnection could last.

Of course, after arriving back into civilization I was immediately on the Facecrack again trying to see what everyone had been up to all week. Did I miss anything? No, not really but the addiction is still very much alive.

So what am I gonna do about it? Why would I keep subjecting myself to something that makes me unhappy? Well for one, I am very far away from my family and friends and I do wanna feel connected. So for me, going off Facebook cold turkey is not an option.

Ironically, Dr Oz had a show a few days ago about 5 things happy people do that you should too and limiting social media was the first suggestion to be happy.  Prior to seeing this clip, I had given myself a compromise: I would only go on Facebook once a day. But Dr Oz had a more realistic plan: 1 day off of social media a week! Perfect I will start there!

I can do this, I can beat this addiction! So if you see less of me on Facebook, just know I am  no longer living my life in the land of status updates and wondering if my boobs are still the perkiest from DHS Class of 1992!