Saturday, April 26, 2014

Join us! The Witching Hour: a storytelling night for parents

Are you a writer and a parent living in Amsterdam? Then come tell us a story or listen to other local writers tell theirs. 

It's gonna be a chance not only for writers to meet and support another but also there will be food, drinks and music...GRATIS!  

So you wanna know the details? It's happening on 17 May from 7 - 9 pm at The English Bookshop. So sign up here and we will see you there!

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Dear celiac disease, Please go away...

Dear celiac disease,

I hate you. I'm so angry that you have not only caused me to suffer so much not only in the last month but most of my life. I am so pissed off that you have like a hundred or more symptoms and are never consist from person to person, making it very difficult to diagnose. It took 40 years and countless doctors to finally figure out what was causing my tiredness, crazy hormones, upset stomach and pain, anemia, on and off lactose intolerance, sucky immune system and well lots of other little things not worth mentioning.

I can't believe you are robbing me of the enjoyment of some of most favorite foods. And the fear you have inflicted on me, I am scared to death to eat anything besides bananas and rice. The fear I have of being "gluttened" again and all the pain and long nights in the bathroom it brings. It hurts like hell and then I become weak because I'm getting dehydrated from all the diaherra. It takes days or a week to recover. Thanks!

And thanks for ruining what social life I have left! The one thing I enjoy (ed) doing was going out to dinner. Now, this becomes a game of russian roulette: which dish will poison my body and destroy my small intestines?

That's right, you destroy my intestines. You make eating gluten free a must if I want to live a long healthy life. And thanks for being so closely related to a gluten allergy. Now when I tell people I can't eat gluten, they say oh well just a little won't hurt or they look at me like yeah right. Or the best one, don't believe everything you read on the internet. Little do they know you are an auto-immune disease that is serious business.

And why don't some doctors take you seriously? My doctor tells me over the phone I am stuck with you and just says well eat gluten free. HELLO, that is the worst thing to tell someone just diagnosed. I had to endure several nights of pain and countless toilet trips to learn gluten free products are not gluten free. I had to learn after days of bloatedness that celiacs often become lactose intolerant until their intestines

Celiac disease, you have robbed me of so much, I hate that I have to live in fear of food and social events. I hate that I have to watch everyone enjoy birthday cake at parties while my mouth waters. And I won't even talk about my emotional  eating. It's just not the same eating a carrot during PMS.

Well, I am off to bed now celiac disease because I am so sick with a cold virus, I can hardly take care of myself much less my family, all thanks to you weaking my immune system. You asshole!

Maybe one day we can live with one another and I can accept you for who you are, but not now. Now I hate you and mourn the loss of my old cake, chocolate, pasta, bread eating life!

I wish you would go away,
a celiac