Showing posts with label Kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kids. Show all posts

Friday, April 19, 2013

I feed my kids rotten meat

Here is the rotten meat in a box
My kids are FREAKS when it comes to eating. I am constantly reading or listening to other mothers complain about their children's eating habits. Either their children won't eat, or won't eat veggies, or will only eat sweets.

Not my kids. No, my kids love broccoli, cauliflower, green beans and even sprouts. They will eat just about anything you put in their dinner "bowl". They are like little hungry pups, literally lapping up their feed. Not normal!

And to really flip me out, they pretend their food is actually something else. Green beans are grass for the plant eaters and broccoli are baby trees. Hello, they are not suppose to know that trick! That was the trick I had ready up my sleeve to get them to eat their veggies.

Let me give you an example of the latest kookiness of my offspring. I decided to start acting like an old fart and work on my digestive sytem. So I bought myself a box of Kelloggs Bran. You know, that cereal that actually not only looks like little tree twigs but tastes like it too.

Well sometimes I eat it raw, or without milk and the other day I had left a bowl on the table while I went into the kitchen to grab a spoon.

Then I hear, "Yummmm carrion!" "Ahhh look Luca, I found some carrion." And I can then hear the sound of the bowl being tossed around the table from their lapping.

Yes, my kids were taking turns licking up bran cereal from my bowl (Ok I never said they had good table manners). Disgusting!

"Mama, we are eating carrion, we are T-Rexes!" First of all I have no idea what the hell carrion is, the only thing I know is that they talk about it on Dinosaur Train. So I look it up quickly on my phone: Dead, rotting, decaying meat.

So now every morning since, my kids jump on me begging for carrion for breakfast! Why can't my kids eat oatmeal or toast like the other kids. Nope, my kids insist on eat rotting dinosaur meat for breakfast! I told you, FREAKS!